When I was fifteen, my dad died. He was a police officer. He was on call to a robbery. He didn’t make it. The robber did, but my dad didn’t. Having one of your dad’s best friends come to the door and ask if your mom’s there, that kind of thing. I just knew. I knew that he was in heaven, which was good, but in that moment, you know, of having a good life and not really having any problems, then this happens. I was like, “You know, what do I do?” And so in that moment, I didn’t ask God why, I just asked Him for help.
I felt the Lord very strongly, the day that my dad died. It was a really, really pretty spring day. It was a Saturday. It was just really windy. So many people were coming to bring us food and talk to us. That kind of thing. I felt the Lord say, “You know, I’m the wind, and I’m always with you. Just trust me.” It was very comforting because God is the Comfort. I’m just thankful that through that I knew that the Lord was telling me everything was going to be okay. No matter what just happened. It’s going to be okay.
A lot of other people and some family members were very mad at God. And they asked, “Why?” And they were very mad at God and wanted the person killed. They wanted the whole family to go to jail, that kind of thing, which, you know, they’re in jail. And so, you know, there’s that, you know, if you do that, you have to be punished. That kind of thing. But, with that being said, I didn’t feel that way. And with that, I didn’t really know why. Um, well no, I did know why. I mean, it was because of God. Because I feel like if I didn’t have God at that point in my life, and I didn’t have that growing relationship with Him that I wouldn’t have been able to go through it. Because I’m nineteen today. It’s about to be four years. But, you know, the Lord has just shown me that even afterward, not having a dad then having a step dad and having a new family, that you know, I can totally trust in the Lord in everything that He has done and that He will do. I often pray a prayer, you know. If I wake up in the morning, it’s like, “God, I thank you for everything you’ve done and everything you will do in my life, and I trust you.” I think a word that has represented my life and has continued to represent my life is the word “Trust.”