One night I fell asleep at a party because I was high on drugs. I woke up to three guys holding me down putting a needle in my arm shooting me up with something to make me even higher. Then they gang raped me. I came close to dying that night. They aggravated me and tormented me at school. At that time the only way I knew how to handle it was to do drugs because I didn’t know how to go to God.
At fifteen years old I met the man I fell in love with, got pregnant and had a son. I was with him for twenty-seven years, and was a drug addict the entire time. We dealt with some bad people so my husband bought a gun to protect our family. One evening while cleaning it he was killed. Our youngest son was seated beside him when it happened. My life turned upside down and, as always, I turned to drugs to handle my situation, instead of turning to God.
I came to the point that I was dealing drugs and wanted to die. So I tried to overdose. By the grace of God I was arrested that night. While in the County jail I took advantage of every jail ministry that came in. The ladies [in the ministries] would come in and tell their testimonies. They would sing and smile. I said, “God, I need that in my life. I need you to take over my life and control me because I’ve messed up my life. I’ve done things my way instead of yours.”
From that day my life changed. Things that other ladies were doing I didn’t want to do. I stayed more to myself. When others fought and argued I didn’t want to participate in any of it. I would walk away. It was not that way in my old life. I would have been one of the ring leaders, right in the middle of it. When new girls would come in and the inmates ganged up and took their stuff I would sit on my bunk and cry because I couldn’t do anything to help them. I would pray. “God, please send the police down here to help them because I can’t. I can’t fight them all”
I now know how to use the bible as an instruction manual to get through my days. I’ve been [drug free] for two years. God is doing so many things in my life. He has restored my family. I going on a mission trip. He’s healed my broken heart over my husband’s death.