Find
Hope
She came home and said, “I wrecked your truck today.” Of course, I jumped off the deep end and immediately wanted to go reach for a beer and some drugs to drown out the emotions.
When God spoke to me I left my career to be a stay-at-home mom. I left all the glitz and glamour and all the supposedly wonderful things. I started completely over, but with God in my heart this time.
So, I had a glass of wine and I got a buzz. I thought; “This is pretty good.” I was immediately addicted.
"I started to understand that was the void I was trying to fill is that I didn’t have Him in my life."
"The problem was that I believed in Jesus absolutely. I just didn't know Jesus."
"She thought I wasn't listening. But really I was."
I’ve never in my life felt so wanted and so and so needed and so desirable.
It became a vicious cycle of doing cocaine to stay up all day sot I could work and then doing heroin to sleep late at night.
"I really wanted to call him and say, “I’m sorry for what I had done.” Months earlier if you’d asked me I wouldn’t have admitted to have done anything wrong."
.....that’s when I began to take the pain medication to numb the hurt on the inside.